Relationship with Kids

The Sensitivity of kids

People, especially kids, can sense the animals, people. Kids can sense if you have love for them or not. Kindness should be your intention. They sense your intention. So before you do anything, change your intention. Once you change your intention, Allah will change their heart, or their reception. So, be careful with whatever you are saying, explain again and again maybe, and talk less and listen more.

Listen to the kids

That is the other thing. Why don’t you listen to them instead of keep telling them this, this, this, dang dang dang…


Maybe you will also learn something. Just because they are kids, do not think that they do not know anything. They are closer to God than you. Their nafs [ego] has not kicked in yet, like ours. They are more with their hearts. Kids. Young people. Younger generation.

Qur’an References

That is because Allah never changes the blessing He bestows on any community until they first change what is in themselves. And truly, Allah is Sami [The Listener; The Hearer] and Alim [The All-Knowing One]. (Al Anfal:53)

Truly, Ibrahim [Abraham] was soft-hearted, full of empathy, inclined to call often on Allah with tender feeling. (Hud:75)

It was by the mercy and kindness of Allah that you (Muhammad) were lenient, soft and gentle with them. If you had been harsh and hardhearted, they would have dispersed from around you. Therefore, forgive them and seek absolution for them. Consult with them about how to run the affairs (of the expedition); then, when you reach a decision, refer your affairs to Allah. Without a doubt, Allah loves those who refer their affairs to Him. (Aal-e Imran:159)

Click here for more references from the Qur’an…


Fi’il-i Muhammad: the example shown in Prophet Muhammad’s (peace be upon him) daily actions of how human beings should live in accordance with Allah’s wishes; Prophet Muhammad’s (pbuh) implementation of sharia; tariqa

tariqa: path; Sufi order

This is an edited excerpt of a Sohbet given on May 10, 2008 by Murshid Shaykh Taner Vargonen Ansari and published on on January 30, 2023. The translation of the Qur’an verses are also from Murshid Shaykh Taner Vargonen Ansari.

Did you read the previous parts of this Sohbet or would you like to read them again?
Here are the links below:

(Part 1)
Relationship – Introduction

(Part 2)
Relationship – Problems and Solutions

(Part 3)
Relationship Examples

Do you have any questions?

Watch the live Q&A and Zikr sessions previously held on the Aqrtsufi YouTube Channel.

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Love, peace and togetherness in goodness

Ya Wadud Ya Salaam Ya Jami Ya Nafi

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